Lessons in Chapter 39: Gateway to Me

Every year comes with its own lessons, boundaries, and fears. Usually, I'm happy to celebrate my birthday by hanging out with those dear to me, having a good time, and then going back to regular life the next day. But this year? This one feels monumental. I feel bigger and wiser—like I've arrived at some pinnacle of understanding myself without needing to explain it to anyone else.

You see, I'm not 40 yet, but I'm so close I can taste it. And life as I know it is changing again. Part of this shift is about me, part of it's about my family, but I'm here for all of it. My kids is growing up, getting ready to spread those wings this fall (hello, empty nest lite!), and mama's proud but also feeling all the feelings.

The excitement and nervous energy collided in me, making me really pay attention to the shifts happening inside—more than I would have if we weren't looking at such a major life change-up.

The Decade Breakdown (According to This Almost-40-Year-Old)

Your 20s are for climbing ladders and finding your table. You don't have to be everyone's cup of tea, but you must taste the flavors to see what works for you.

Your 30s are for building a family, sitting at your chosen table, learning to talk to those around you, sipping lightly, and figuring out what "enjoy" really means.

Your 40s? That's about eating the whole meal without a napkin if you choose, because why the heck not. It's your choice.

Tidbits of Wisdom for Year 39

I am timeless, fun, colorful, and full of grown-girl energy. I may be a woman, but that whole "boss up" energy makes me tired. Sometimes, the little girl who needs some silly, ridiculous time must come out, so grown-girl it is.

Prioritizing my passions is non-negotiable. I have SO much love for travel as a window to the world outside. It's perspective, it's appreciation, it's the people you meet whose stories you carry with you. It's getting out of your comfort zone. Being able to embark on adventures and share them with others means everything to me.

Moving my body and nourishing myself well matters more than any mediocre parts of the day. I cannot tell you how many times I forgot to eat or did it sitting at my desk still working, coupled with not taking time to move my body or even just going for a walk outside because I was "too tired" or didn't have "time." All done with that noise. Not today, Satan. I first, then the world, because I cannot be part of it if I don't care for myself.

I'm letting go of the guilt, shame, overthinking, and overworked tendencies. Mom guilt? See ya—I'm a great mom, ask the kid. Work guilt? Nope, take me out of the rat race. The "but I haven't..." excuses laden with obligations? Hard pass.

"No" is a complete sentence for my peace and yours.

Investing in friends that last the rest of my lifetime. True friendship matters, and people who care about you with no strings attached deserve your attention. I'm at the stage where those people who make no effort and just want to chill out and do life alongside me are worth it. I'll be making the time, not just giving lip service.

Writing it all down. I love to write—physically and on paper. I used to be devoted to my journal daily, but I let the busy bug take over. It doesn't help me be okay. I need that physical pause. In fact, I got a new fancy journal and pens for my birthday to kickstart that motivation. It's an investment in me.

See more. Dream more. Photograph more. I used to want to be either a doctor, a teacher, or a photographer for National Geographic who traveled and took pictures of the world to capture its beauty. Honey, childhood dreams die hard. One dream down (probably going to nix the doctorate... maybe no limiting beliefs, though). The photography dream? Oh, I'm all in. I may not work for Nat Geo (yet—maybe that'll be my 50s!), but what's stopping me from learning and shooting more? Me. Yeah. Changing that.

Being okay with sharing all parts of me authentically. Fun fact: 98% of the things I intend to share, I don't—because I'm afraid of who might see and what they might think. When you shove parts of yourself down, it's like putting a Mentos into a two-liter of Coke and shaking it. Explosions look like periods of depression, anxiety, and doubt. Everyone gets me as I am all the time. Because if you're judging me, that's a you problem.

I love Disney, but I'm not stuff-focused—I'm feelings-focused. My life isn't always picture-perfect; it's messy and silly, but it's mine. That counts for well, everything. Sure, I still love my Disney merch. That won't change, but in a curated, specific kind of way, for the mushy feelings inside, not for the trophy consumerism show.

The Gateway Moment

There's something liberating about ignoring the unwritten rules about being a grown-up and just being you. This chapter is a gateway to the me I am, not the me the world told me to be.

So here's to 39—to empty nest adventures waiting around the corner, to picking up that camera, to saying no without explanation, and to traveling to escape and discover. To slow mornings with my journal, meaningful connections, and yes, even a little Disney magic along the way.

Welcome to my story, travel besties. It's messy, it's real, and it's just getting started.